How’s the Serenity?
I’ve toyed with the idea of keeping a diary and maybe one day turning it into a book, but honestly I have greater things to achieve than to rehash the past to monetise my misery, so I’ll just tell it here…
Dear Diary… Last night Nine News in Brisbane ran a story on my family. My stomach was knotted with anxiety leading up to 6pm as I knew it would almost certainly reveal what I consider to be my “weaker side”. Online no one sees me cry and though I make no secret of the fact that I am an emotional person, people imagine me to be a strong, independent woman, with no fear – the woman fighting the David and Goliath battle, against all odds… you get the picture (incidentally, that scene plays out best with the epic music in the background and with me wearing a cape, clenched fists on hips and gazing out to the horizon).
Yes, I know that every news producer wants the sympathy shot of mum or dad crying, the kids looking sad etc, etc. And of course, I gave them no shortage of mum crying to use. What you probably don’t consider, however, is that it takes a lot guts to get on the telly when you know that you look like you’ve been lost in the wilderness for a month. It takes even more guts to get on the telly knowing that no one (other than those who know me) will ever have any sympathy for a family with nine kids – simply because they just cannot relate to what that might be like and people fear the unknown. We’re a freak show – we have been that way for years – Japanese tourists line us up to take photos. I shit you not!
So why do it? Because it matters. Because nothing will ever be achieved by allowing your fears to rule your destiny and because it’s not just about me.
Anyone who says they don’t care what people think of them is either full of shit, or so up themselves that they probably won’t be able to hear what you’re saying about them anyway. Of course I care what people say or think of me and it’s a natural female trait to be conscious of how you look. I think even the biggest tomboy in the world has moments when they want to feel “pretty”. And standing next to the gorgeous slim Sylvia, impeccably dressed and made up – I have to tell you, I felt like an old leather boot that had been left on the doorstep in the weather.
And through all the humiliation of seeing the toll this whole ordeal had taken on my physical being we actually laughed because our kids had the fore-thought to be humorous! I don’t know if the story will be made available online but if it is look out for my eldest son, Loki, reading a book – upside-down. And watch our second eldest son AJ tripping over as he walks out of the tent. They can take our house but they canny take our sense of humour.
The great thing about the story, was that it did strongly emphasis what a tight family we are and I’d challenge anyone to show me a more loving and devoted team of individuals than what we call the “Bogilvies”. It reminded me a little of that great Aussie film “The Castle” – except for the fact that we’ve already lost our house…which is actually totally opposite to “The Castle” but actually exactly the same. Confused? Me too. Thank goodness no one reads this.
What it says, however, is that maybe it’s not so much a man, or woman’s house that is their castle, but in fact it’s contents. It’s the family that maketh the home, and with a family like ours – be it tents or bricks and mortar – our home will always be a castle.
May your castle be built on foundations as strong as ours.
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The fact that you make something so shithouse humourous is a testament to your character. What doesn’t kill you Cate.
Bernadette Morley´s last blog ..BROTHER FROM ANOTHER MOTHER
Something for you to ponder.
This is harsh – From the letter to the Government etc I was really thinking of your family, subscribed to the email etc. While I wish you well, when you write sentences such as I s*** you not! Some people me included do put you into the stereotypical dole bludging lower class and dont feel like helping out. People help their own and sadly the government do not consider themselves lower class. Yes I do agree we all do care what people think of us. Even those of us that are stuck up. I wish you well in securing your family a home.
Rizoleey´s last blog ..Merry Christmas
Julie Reply:
January 10th, 2010 at 6:11 pm
I shit you not Rizoleey, even the Mum’s of a double income, middle class, housed family with only 2 children swear. Try looking at the message Cate is eloquently putting across rather than her choice of words. I think you’ll find she is far from your stereotypical dole bludger.
Julie´s last blog ..New year, new resolve
Rizoleey Reply:
January 10th, 2010 at 8:41 pm
Funny Julie, just had a look at your blog, dont seem to see any of that language on it!! Do you or dont you use cus words in your own blog. Im sure it will be great for business!!!
Rizoleey´s last blog ..Merry Christmas
Julie Reply:
January 11th, 2010 at 10:21 am
No,I don’t because it is a business blog and I feel it is inappropriate in that situation. Nor do I use them in a business situation in real life or around my children. But this is Cate’s personal blog and I think if I had a personal blog I would use them in my writing the same way I do in my personal life.
Julie´s last blog ..New year, new resolve
Kat Reply:
January 10th, 2010 at 6:46 pm
@Rizoleey ur seriously are a class-A moron. You must be one of the ‘perfect’ one’s Cate depicts in her writings.
Thank god I left Qld, so my poor children wont ever have to endure your wrath, just piss off. I am sure that there’s a kid somewhere that you can put on detention – school holidays or not.
Bree Reply:
January 10th, 2010 at 8:38 pm
I’m with Julie, – Rizoleey – I think saying shit is the last thing that should draw your attention in this blog. In fact I think even you – if put in this same position (although it seems you have no empathy to be able to imagine yourself there) would have more than shit to say. Its sad that there are people like you out there that are clearly all about appearances.
Rizoleey Reply:
January 10th, 2010 at 9:34 pm
keep reading Bree, say sorry when you feel like it.
You are a strong woman, Cate. You and Rick and your kids are all amazing. Just because you cry doesn’t make you any less strong. *hugs*
And for crying out loud, lighten up, Rizoleey. Geez. There are bigger things in life to worry about. Such as the content of what you just read.
Coralie´s last blog ..Clothes swap parties
Rizoleey Reply:
January 10th, 2010 at 8:42 pm
see reply below
I didn’t see the show, but I’m glad the media is taking up the story. And down the track, when you are ready … I am sure there is a book in it too.
I think what you are doing is awesome … not just the survival thing, but you are showing that what is most is important in a family is love – and being a family. You may not have a home, but you have something that many people would kill for – each other.
I am tempted not to reply because I think idiotic comments like these are best ignored, but I just had to add a voice of reason: everything Rizoleey wrote is utter nonsense. Labelling people as ‘upper’ or ‘lower’ class and deciding who is ‘worthy’ of basic human rights such as suitable housing is unjust, and pathetic. Time for something really harsh Rizoleey- people like me see you make comments like that and think you are a horrible human being. Think I’m being hard on you? No more so than you are on the most vulnerable people in our community. I hope one day your eyes and heart are opened and the ugliness is lifted from you, and others with similar opinions in our community. Good on you Cate, for challenging people’s assumptions and prejudices against people who have needs which don’t ‘fit’ with what society has to offer, and I hope you are never discouraged by negative comments.
Rizoleey Reply:
January 10th, 2010 at 8:48 pm
You judge me Emma yet you dont know me, You look at a handful of sentences and decide if you like me or not then and there. That is the point I was making above. A few sentences containing S*** make it easy to judge someone. I have worked with homeless kids, not from loving families though, but from drug addicts, who allow their kids to live under bridges and and creek beds. I have provided clothing if they have turned up at school, taken them to the op shop to buy shoes, provided lunches to 20 kids every day for 3 school terms. I have picked lice from hair, and put ointment on scabies. So judge away. You are no different to me, you only choose to jugde me as a person rather than the words someone else wrote.
Emma Reply:
January 10th, 2010 at 10:08 pm
That you yourself were willing to judge someone else based on their words, and to claim that I was being unfair when I “look at a handful of sentences and decide if you like me or not then or there” is ironic. I was hoping you would react to that unfair judgement of mine, it was exactly why I wrote what I did. Were my judgements incorrect? I expect so. I think perhaps your judgements may also be incorrect. You believe you were only judging words, and not the “person”, but by describing so-called lower class people of being less deserving you were making very deep, personal judgements. I expect most most people to be basically decent, yourself no doubt included. I hope through this, some of your prejudices can be challenged. I think that Cate’s example proves that there are a lot of prejudices and injustices which need to be challenged.
Rizoleey Reply:
January 11th, 2010 at 7:05 am
I dont claim you are being unfair. You are being the same as the majority of the population. You look at a few words and make a judgement. Thats what happens in blogs, you only see a tiny bit of the whole picture. I personally take offense to the use of swearing in blogs. Once I have finished replying to all the comments aimed at me I wont come back to this one. Cate obviously does not want me to check out my friends farm for her family and that is fine. It is easier for me to walk away.
So now self-righteous people are criticising Cate’s use of the English language. This woman has things to get off her chest; it is Cate’s blog and if you do not like what you read, THEN DO NOT READ IT!
What is it with Aussies and kicking someone when they are already down? Go on all you nasty people out in cyberspace, keep kicking Cate and Rick. You are doing a brilliant job at it!
This family is staying in my backyard for a short break from the camping. Did I know Cate and Rick and all the kids before they came – NO! Imagine how these kids were feeling turning up at a stranger’s house. How would your children cope doing that; how would you cope?
I have got to know this family so well and realised how spoilt our own six children have been over the years and believe me, they have grown up sharing everything with very little luxuries; the Bolt children appreciate everything their parents provide for them, regardless of how trivial it might be.
Every time you attack Cate [for reasons I just cannot understand], you are attacking 9 amazing children as well. Never once have these kids complained about living in a tent, not having their own toys to play with, and not being able to see their friends over the holidays. These kids do not whinge about being hungry between meals or being bored like we know ALL kids do when it is holidays. I bet YOUR children have been doing that all holidays. These kids live on water and believe me, the Hinze Dam should be dry with the amount of water they have been drinking.
Imagine 8 boys up to the age of 18. You would expect a few swear words to slip. Well you self righteous people, yes some words did slip – ‘you are an idiot’ and even ‘shut up’ have been heard and as quick as they have been uttered, both parents have reprimanded their children for doing so. Shock horror, such ‘stereotypical dole bludging lower class’ use of the English language.
Why not take a good look at yourselves before taking great pleasure in giving it to Cate and Rick time and time again because I am sure your perfect lives and perfect families are really not so perfect if you were really truthful.
So many people are missing the crux of the problem. The Bolts are NOT after charity. They are NOT after handouts. They are NOT even after a Department of Housing home. All they want is somewhere to live that IS permanent. They ARE even willing to live in a caravan park [would you in the same situation] but they cannot find any permanent accommodation in the Maroochydoore area. This area is where one of boys has been selected to join a special in-school program for talented junior cricketers. Imagine if he will never be able to realise his own dreams of trying out for the Australia Cricket team because he had to go to a different school not offering the same in-school program?
Cate and Rick are very proud people and it hurts me to see what is happening to them. It hurts me to see their children watch their parents in such pain. Even more so, it really pains me to see the lack of compassion in the human race; I guess no-ne is perfect – are they?
If I did have a blog I would name it ‘reality check people!’
kristin Reply:
January 10th, 2010 at 8:39 pm
Way to go Gayle, thankyou for putting loud mouthed idiots in their place.
Rizoleey Reply:
January 10th, 2010 at 8:53 pm
You can take delight in knowing my family is far from perfect. We too have moved numerous times in the past few years, we have endured 4 job losses in 5 years for reasons not of our own. You may like to read some of the other replys I have posted to other people along the way.
Kat Reply:
January 11th, 2010 at 3:48 am
@Rizoleey -I’d rather not you’re a peanut and have proudly put that on display for all to see…. And surprise, surprise, now you’re upset by the criticism it has evoked, take the hint…. bugger off.
amandarose Reply:
January 10th, 2010 at 9:31 pm
Dear Gayle, what a lovely person you must be to take in a big family. Finally some sanity.
Also I think you have explained Cates situation much better then she has about why she needs to stay near that area. Good luck to her young talented son.
It was all well said, Cate. Both the open letter, and this “diary entry” today.
Your family will get you through, and help you keep on fighting.
Jodie at Mummy Mayhem´s last blog ..Tagged: A Photo Meme – The Happy Couple
Rizoleey – What can one say about the “shit” (Ohhh sorry S*** to put it in your pathetic readable language) that you posted on Cates blog? Why on earth the mediator would even allow such rubbish to make it into the comments is beyond me. But again from following Cates blog for some time, she allows nothing to be held back.
Like most, I should just let the “my shit don’t stink” attitude of such a pretentious twat waft off into the distance, but being who I am……. I can’t. I’m not second class, I’m not trash, I’m a well educated Australian (with the pretentious pieces of paper to prove it) that has been made aware of an injustice to a hard working family that has come upon hard times and in the bigger picture a serious issue facing Australia. I can see the humour that Cate has used in this post to continue to help her fight for her family and bring to the attention of all Australians this issue. To judge one on the basis of some humour and a word not often considered offensive is just insane. Does the Prim Minister deserve the same disrespect because he spoke of a “shit fight”? Previous posts refer to those that are perfect; I’m guessing you’re the one? If you are then congratulations, if not I suggest you shove your head up your snobby arse and mumble away to your lower intestine, because it may just understand the shit you spew forth.. Hopefully this makes it through the moderator and you find it offensive, just as I have found you and your attitude.
Keep fighting Cate “Don’t let the bastards win”
Erica Reply:
January 10th, 2010 at 8:11 pm
^^What he said!
Rizoleey Reply:
January 10th, 2010 at 9:00 pm
Exactly Trevor the Prime Minister is an embarrassment to our country. His language is totally inappropriate. And who are the bastards and what do they win? Surely having a family being homeless is not a prize to be proud of! I’m disgusted that we have so many homeless people in our country. I don’t want the family to live the way they do, sure it might be fun for a week or two as a holiday, but not as a way of life.
Dear Cate & Rick & family…
I saw AJ trip as he came out of the tent… and he gave a little grin…. I like the kid!!! You are all handling this so bravely and with great dignity. You will achieve something not just for yourselves but for others who might otherwise have to endure the same journey. Certainly…. your story must be written in a book…. or in the future no one will believe what has happened and I believe you will tell it like it really was…!
Amidst all the angst and the stress I do detect a positive streak in you still. Stay strong….
Okay then, tell me this – If people in power were to read this blog and comments tonight are they going to walk away hearing the humour of the blog, or the angst, or are they going to hear my words repeated through your voices ‘lower class dole bludger’.
Obviously this family has hit hard times, I don’t disagree with that. What I intended to say was that the language used is not helpful. Argue all you like if you were to turn up in court and plead your case calling the judge a S*** you would not get very far. This is a private blog, put to a public form. People interested in the familys plight will view it. Future landlords will view it if they have a genuine interest in renting to the family. I know that if it was me I would be putting my best foot forward and watching what I said and what I wrote. It is not hard to write “I kid you not” or “full of it” .
As I said earlier, I wish the family well in securing a home. Hopefully there is a homeowner in the area with a house available large enough for the family to rent. Or hopefully the government will purchase a home large enough and rent it to the family. Which is what they should do, and in the mean time they should offer the family a smaller home to use until such a house becomes available.
To all the people criticising what I have written I ask you how many of you have replied to this blog for the first time tonight only to have a go at me? How many of you have taken the time to write to the government about the housing crisis? How many of you have called local caravan parks to ask for a special deal for the family? How many of you have offered your caravan or camper trailer so that the family does not have to hire one?
I will say it again as it was not heard the first time. I wish the family well in securing a home.
Rizoleey´s last blog ..Merry Christmas
Sandi Reply:
January 10th, 2010 at 9:05 pm
I imagine that people in power, in fact people anywhere, would UNDERSTAND, would FORGIVE, ACCEPT, even EXPECT ‘shit’ to be thrown around once or twice. I also imagine that if it were me in the situation I’d be throwing around, and writing, words more offensive than shit.
When I hear the word shit – out of the mouth of ANYONE – I do not assume they are a from a lower class, or are a dole bludger. Perhaps you should visit a University tutorial class? I fear you may not like the language thrown around in them, so perhaps not.
I imagine anyone taking issue with such wording to be very petty considering the circumstances. To look for the one flaw, the only thing they could find to pin on a person and family so beautiful.
To answer your questions: how many of us have taken the time to write to the PM? The Government? Most, I imagine. I have. Have you?
Have we offered housing? Some of us are not in the same state, some of us don’t have much we can materially give, but if all we are giving is our support in what way we can, our wishes, our hopes, then I imagine the Bolt family is grateful for that.
We heard you the first time. You wished them well. Big shit, oops, I mean deal. But for you to seriously state that when you read the word shit you ‘don’t feel like helping out’ is a sincere and utter cop out. It’s actually embarrassing.
PS I’m an Editor and the fact that you failed to place apostrophes in many of your words and showed poor grammar offended me – so much so that one day, if you were homeless, I’d be so outraged I don’t think I could attempt to help you.
Sounds ridiculous doesn’t it? That’s because it is. Oh also, just because you showed poor grammar doesn’t mean I automatically assume you’re a ‘lower class dole bludger’. Even though you very well could be. So, next time, may you learn to allow someone the benefit of the doubt, or the respect, to assume that they also are not.
If you truly wish the family well then drop it. Drop your petty argument and do what any intelligent person does – seals their lips when they realise they spoke out of line.
I’m here to continue backing up the Bolt family, as I know many others are, so the choice is simple – wish them well and drop it, or allow our comments to shit you so much you cannot help but reply. In which case I will believe that you don’t wish the family well, but merely want to prove a point.
Cate, hang in there, and know that for every person out there nit picking things that don’t matter, there are hundreds of others cheering you on and caring about the things that really do.
Cate Reply:
January 10th, 2010 at 9:11 pm
Sorry, I don’t know your real name to address you appropriately. Thank you for taking the time to express your opinion. Apparently most of my readers don’t agree with you, but that is the beauty of living in Australia – we accept diversity.
Most of the people who have commented here have been reading my blog for a long time, many of them have offered great support and gotten to know me well. One has even allowed me to camp in her back yard. They have all done so out of compassion, not because they are life long friends or family members, just because the words I wrote struck a chord with them.
I am an Australian woman – if you take the time to read back through my blog you will see I have had a very diverse work history – and I call a spade a spade. If anyone is not going to rent me a house because I used the word “shit” a couple of times in a light hearted post that was intended to demonstrate the love and unity of my own family, then I’m more than happy to have missed that opportunity.
If you truly are interested in understanding who I am, I suggest you read the post “I Am Me”. No matter how much attention this blog draws, no matter what I do or say, I will be criticised. I would rather be criticised for being myself, than for being what I am not.
I’m sorry you feel that I cannot be anything but “lower class” if I use a bit of Aussie larikan speak to express my opinion but as an Aussie – I respect your right to have that opinion.
May the Universe provide you all that you deserve.
Rizoleey Reply:
January 10th, 2010 at 9:32 pm
Is a farm at Malaney to far to travel? Not sure of the exact distance. My former teacher aid has a granny flat. Would you like me to see if it could be made available? It would still mean camping but it has a toilet shower and small kitchen.
100+ cows and some other hobby animals are there too. Write back if you are interested,, otherwise I might just stay away.
amandarose Reply:
January 10th, 2010 at 9:40 pm
I take it you find this language very offensive and just meant that it doesn’t come across well. Maybe it would have been more appropriate to tell cate this in a private email rather then another public attack at a sensitive time.
I realise you meant well and are not a mean or nasty person.
I think your view of how the majority of people view swearing is out dated however and I ame sure Cate meant no offence.
Rizoleey Reply:
January 10th, 2010 at 9:53 pm
You are soooooooo right amandarose. I only just saw the contact button up the top. It blends in with my webbrowser. However I think she has decided to let Karma take place and let the universe deal with me. If only she knew how unhappy I really am at the moment. In a misguided way of helping I stuffed up and have a whole persons followers off side. I guess it will just make me do more to see this through. Hopefully some good will come of all of this. maybe this many hits will get some sponsors onto the blog for a bit more of an income.
Dear Cate,
Thank you for having the strength and character to share your story with all of us. I can only have admiration for someone who can not only raise 9 gorgeous children (I only have 4 and sometimes wonder how I will ever get through the day) but who can find the good in a truly shitty situation.
I am horrified to hear of your situation because our lives are very much like yours and I had always blindly believed that, should we hit hard times, my government would be there to support us. I am furious to know that this is not necessarily true.
I wish you and yours happiness, good health and a home and I sincerely hope that the government steps up sooner rather than later. At least noone can take from you the truly important things in this life – your beautiful family.
You are an inspiration.
Exactly Trevor the Prime Minister is an embarrassment to our country. His language is totally inappropriate. And who are the bastards and what do they win? Surely having a family being homeless is not a prize to be proud of! I’m disgusted that we have so many homeless people in our country. I don’t want the family to live the way they do, sure it might be fun for a week or two as a holiday, but not as a way of life.
Laughing that you wrote ‘no one reads this’!!!
xx
I love that last part – it’s so true the real treasures in our lives are not material.
I love your attitude where you are at and I hope you have a solid roof over the whole family very soon.
Michelle´s last blog ..Please welcome – Cara Salley
When people start stereotyping people using swear words, you feel like giving up! Here inthe UK I’ve worked for some titled people (I mean Lords etc) and my friends work for Dukes – swear words are not restricted to the ‘lower classes’, certainly not here. Cate’s use of one (one minor one I might add) in her blog does not mean she would walk into a courtroom and call the judge a shit. There – I said it too. No, I’m not a lower class dole bludger either – I’m very middle class with a very good job. Don’t use swear words in my blog because I haven’t been pushed to the limits like Cate. Also, young children I know read mine so I have to be careful. Feel like swearing through Twitter though at random comments like this. If your government can’t see Cate’s humour then that might well be one of it’s big problems!
And yes – I have commented on this blog before, and yes I have contacted your Prime Minister. If people can give me contact details for your Housing Department and campsites I’d be happy to do likewise.
Go Cate!
Darcy Flannegan´s last blog ..Useful links to articles on palm oil & orangutans
Go Cate and Co!!!
Don’t let the negative nelly’s get to you ( I don’t think you would)
Gee’s you could of said the C word or the F word.. but you didn’t.. now those words are a little boganish..
Here’s to finding some shithot place to live.
Lol..
You are all mad.
Please next time you women find yourselves without a home, Dont swear…it makes you unworthy of help and unnderstanding.
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
I would like to add that these children are all very bright and will all make a difference to the world from their life experiences from such young ages. In years to come when Ailish is Prime Minister of our country, I will say ‘she once camped in my backyard’!
Thank you, you managed to put what I felt much more succinctly… and I laughed for about 2 minutes.
Emma Reply:
January 10th, 2010 at 10:59 pm
—> directed that comment at Sophie
Hello to all! I am still laughing at how many times I read the words “Rizoleey’ last blog”. How many times can one have a “last” blog?
Cate, you are the embodiment of my image of a strong Australian woman! You & Rick are raising an amazing family. Keep on keeping on! You are the bright light for many homeless people! And you do it well.
Good thoughts and prayers from our family. (If you can get to the U.S., the offer to live with us is still open!) Nikki.
Hey Cate, you’re right, really big families are not that common any more, they are out there though! Once upon a time, this country gave medals to mums that had big families, because it was considered to be supportive of the country, keeping up the birthrate and all that. Cate, you deserve that and so much more. A) Because you went through childbirth NINE times (that qualifies you for superhero status in my books) and B) because you are raising 9 wonderful, caring, conscious kids and C) because you have taken your commitment to your country more seriously than your country has taken its commitment to you, in not accepting Government payments that you were eligible for because you believe the taxation system should support everyone through services and those most in need through targeted support. So, the only thing freaky about your family in IMHPO is that you have 11x the spirit, soul and heart of many, and that makes for a lot of amazing energy!